Angel Lullaby

A movie that we have for Jocelyn plays a song in the background that I grew up listening to. I kept catching myself singing it but only remembering the chorus so I decided to look up the lyrics.This song is originally from a play written in...um the 70's? Called My turn on earth which is about the Plan of Happiness. However, when I looked it up I found that people from all over who may have never heard of the play cherish it and use it for so many reasons. How amazing is that?This is why I love music, it speaks to our souls and to each of us in a different way. For me, it is often the answers to my prayers and, the best way for me to express myself. I have found there is always a song that says what I am feeling much better than I can. Which I love. "When emotions are too big to speak, you sing."

Also, in the process of looking for the lyrics I found this blog post, what an amazing reminder of not only how powerful music is, but also that we are all being watched over especially in our most difficult times.




You came from a land where all is light
to a world half day and a world have night

To guard you by day, you have my love
and to guard you by night, your friends above.

So sleep sleep till the darkness ends
guarded by your angel friends
So sleep sleep till the darkness ends
guarded by your angel friends

There is one by the window watching for the dawn
and another to tell you when the night is gone
There is one standing quietly by your bed
and another to sits close, with a hand on your head

So sleep sleep till the darkness ends
guarded by your angel friends
So sleep sleep till the darkness ends
guarded by your angel friends

Words: Carol Lynn Pearson Music: Lex de Azevedo

I love being a Mom

Yesterday morning, while Jocelyn was screaming at me at the top of her lungs because she wanted her bottle not a sippy cup. And at dinner when she was doing the same for similar reasons and other reasons I am still unsure of, I might have questioned this whole motherhood thing.

Then after dinner she decided she would deal with her cup so she drank some milk. than we played. And she was so happy. And she decided to show off all of her cool one year old things she decided to wake up one day and know how to do. Saying hi, randomly picking things up (like her cup, books anything) and covering her face so we can play "where is Jocelyn?", or being a master at going down stairs, and starting to practice more signs with us while watching signing time (watching anything is quite new for her). She also just decided to be so happy and cute. Giggling and laughing and spitting (her favorite), playing chase and talking to the cats. It was such a fun evening I actually could not believe it when I realized it was her bed time. That has never happened. She usually barely makes it to that time. But last night, we had a blast. And all I could think was, I love being a mom. The thought of her giggle and watching her learn just gives me butterflies. One year olds are so fun!

I'll love you forever

Jocelyn was sick tonight. She has randomly been running a fever, tonight was the worst of it all. Happy all day and fine but tonight she ran a temp of 100-101 with tylenol. She could only sleep if I was holding her in the rocking chair. Usually I get grumpy if I am deprived of sleep. But tonight was different. I sat there, with my one year old. I just held her little body, which is not so little anymore. She is big enough now that she just streatches out across me. Then I looked at her little feet. Those feet are not so little anymore either. Then I imagined those feet getting bigger. Thinking about how much more they would grow. How it would not be too long before that little body was so big I might not be able to cuddle her and rock her as easily (don't worry I will still probably try.) Then, of course, I thought of the famous mommy cry book "I'll love you forever" and I realized I knew the meaning of it. This little baby (who is so quickly on her way to toddlerhood) no matter how big she gets, will always be my baby. It does not matter how big that little body grows to be, or those adorable little feet, I will always be there and willing to snuggle her and rock her when she needs it. Just as my mom did for me. I will do for her because "as long as I'm living, my baby [she] will be".

Even better,for all eternity my baby she will be.

1 Year

One Year ago today little J blessed us by coming 4 weeks early. Since I know you want to, you can read about it here. While it was a difficult year due to several difficult and emotional surprises, I can honestly say I am so happy to have her. She is so funny and so happy, she makes me feel a love I never thought I could. Happy Birthday little Jocelyn!

Usually she just stares at the camera like I am crazy. But today, the minute I turned it on she was a complete ham.

Jocelyn and her friend Henry came to visit mom at work for a few minutes. What a nice surprise!

Speaking of Henry, these two are the best of friends. Henry calls her Jos Jos. And Jocelyn HAS to do everything Henry does. I swear she will eat more and do more when around Henry than she will ever do or eat for us (favorite right now is sitting on the counter like in the above picture). They are so cute!

And speaking of cute, I was so fortunate as to be able to get this oh so adorable picture of her at the end of the day when I went to pick her up from Henry's. I cannot get over how cute and big and wonderful this little one year old is.